kawaiifive-oh:

yungbardock:

power stance

I see your power stance and raise you

a majestic mermaid

kawaiifive-oh:

yungbardock:

power stance

I see your power stance and raise you

a majestic mermaid

(via moustachemanaged)

  • child I am babysitting: How do you get grownup teeth?
  • me: You lose your baby teeth
  • child I am babysitting: they fall out!?
  • me: they fall out
  • child I am babysitting: do you still have your baby eyes?
  • me:
  • child I am babysitting: or did they fall out
  • me:
  • me:
  • me: you keep the same eyes all your life
  • child I am babysitting: *touches eyes* whoa
Source: attackonkawaii

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gallifrey-feels:

Coming to the unwelcome realization that you are trapped in a Lovecraftian friendship like “You’re my best friend and I think you’re amazing but I’m pretty sure that if you started resurrecting corpses I would just shrug and help out”

(via atrafeathers)

Source: gallifrey-feels

Text

foxalpha:

falstafff:

i don’t understand why people don’t instantly respond to “what would your dream superpower be” with the ability to manipulate probability.
think about it. what’s the chance someone will drop 1mil in front of me? 0%? let’s make that 100%. what’s the probability i’ll wake up tomorrow and be X gender? 100%. what’s the probability my bathtub is filled with mac and cheese? 100%.

as a casino employee I can confirm this would be terrifying as fuck

(via atrafeathers)

Source: falstafff

(via gameofgifs)

Source: thronesgifs

beowulfstits-archive:

I want to go to this exact point and run around it saying “I’m in Sweden!” I’m in Finland!” “I’m in Norway!” until I get tired
i aspire to great things in life

beowulfstits-archive:

I want to go to this exact point and run around it saying “I’m in Sweden!” I’m in Finland!” “I’m in Norway!” until I get tired

i aspire to great things in life

(via just-me-and-my-cats)

Source: beowulfstits-archive

(via sportdad420)

Source: goodassdog

fandom-universe:

kungfucarrie:

The most dangerous phrase in the language is, “we’ve always done it this way.”

"Come on, let’s mix it up!" The heart surgeon says.
"B-but we’ve always done it this way!" The other replies, "this is how you replace a heart valve."
"That’s the most dangerous phrase in the human language!" The first surgeon replies haughtily as he inputs a fruit loop into the patient’s heart. "This will be his valve. He will be a fruit loop in a world of Cheerios."

fandom-universe:

kungfucarrie:

The most dangerous phrase in the language is, “we’ve always done it this way.”

"Come on, let’s mix it up!" The heart surgeon says.

"B-but we’ve always done it this way!" The other replies, "this is how you replace a heart valve."

"That’s the most dangerous phrase in the human language!" The first surgeon replies haughtily as he inputs a fruit loop into the patient’s heart. "This will be his valve. He will be a fruit loop in a world of Cheerios."

(via fujoshi-trash)

Source: uvmsemba

tittily:

sweet-bitsy:

griefseed:

he does nt even know

Know what

the economic state of america

(via just-me-and-my-cats)

Source: meowstic

genderterrorist:

leowithani:

Shut you up real fast.

DAMN

(via just-me-and-my-cats)

Source: chiraa-khoor

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carry-on-my-wayward-butt:

when u try to caffeinate yourself and just end up increasing ur heart rate with no discernible changes in levels of exhaustion  

image

(via just-me-and-my-cats)

Source: carry-on-my-wayward-butt

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classy-doctor:

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if you are ever sad/stressed/anything and you need to vent, my ask box is always open! (you can send fanmail too if you can)

don’t worry, i won’t publish any of these i recieve

(via agentjjkelly)

Source: classy-doctor

tastefullyoffensive:

[bluechaircomics/via webtoons]

(via survivaliswhatmakesus)

Source: tastefullyoffensive

factota:

fuck

(via aspect-ratios)

Source: factota

humansofnewyork:

"You can make about 75% more money with a cat on your head than you can with a cat on your shoulder."

humansofnewyork:

"You can make about 75% more money with a cat on your head than you can with a cat on your shoulder."

(via moustachemanaged)

Source: humansofnewyork